Dating Advice: What is ‘Love at First Sight’?

April 3, 2011 on 12:51 am | In Uncategorized | No Comments

Is ‘love at first sight’ real, and could it happen to you? If you are hoping to experience this age-old phenomenon while dating, read on to find out more about what it means and how to tell if you might have experienced love at first sight when you first met your dating partner, and whether you should even aim for lightning bolts when dating or simply relax and go with the flow.

Where does the idea of love at first sight’ come from?

The concept of ‘love at first sight’ is thought to have originated in the classical world, where it meant an intense, passionate love delivered by the mythological character Cupid and his arrows when a person beheld the object of their affections for the first time. The Greeks described it as ‘madness from the gods’, and also came up with the idea of ‘love sickness’, a feeling of overwhelming longing and desire, arising when one of Cupid’s arrows pierces the heart.

What we believe now

These days, while we may not imagine Cupid to be so intimately involved in our choice of dating partners, many of us still hold true to romantic ideas of ‘the one’ – the idea that there is one perfect partner for everyone – and to the notion that for some people it is clear who this one perfect partner is from the moment they set eyes on them. But are these concepts based in reality or are they just wishful thinking, and how helpful are they when it comes to navigating today’s dating scene?

What is happening with ‘love at first sight’?

According to research, the intoxicating sensation of love at first sight can, in fact, be explained in a scientific way as a response of the ego to social signals. A major aspect of the experience is thought to be that our narcissistic side responds powerfully to the notion that someone is attracted to us.

Along with being attracted to a person’s appearance, it is possible to tell almost instantly due to minute changes in body language if they are interested in us and to be affected by that, too. Studies have shown that, on a very basic level, we are attracted to people who are attracted to us, and this is a major factor when choosing dating partners.

‘When will waiting for ‘the one’… be done?’

As this quote from fictional love and dating expert Carrie in Sex and the City illustrates, for many the concept of ‘the one’ is unhelpful, and the idea of ‘love at first sight’ can be, as well. If you are unsatisfied with anything but lightning bolts and absolute certainty from the offset that you and the person you are dating are a perfect match, you may reject endless perfectly good dating partners and never find a life partner at all.

In these circumstances it would, arguably, be better for those who want to share a life with someone to ignore ideas of ‘love at first site’ and ‘the one’ when dating, in favour of a more practical approach: ‘I can see myself being very happy with this person’. In the end, it’s up to the individual to decide.

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By: Emily Heart

Dating Advice: Top 6 Things To Look For When Dating A Man

March 26, 2011 on 1:36 am | In Uncategorized | No Comments

While it’s easy to tell if you like the look of your dating partner, how can you tell if they’re right for you in other ways, such as personality, values and goals?

In a recent interview, Michelle Obama urged women not to judge their dating partners purely by the way they look. ‘Cute is good’, she said. ‘But cute only lasts for so long, and then it’s, who are you as a person?’

Here are the top 6 things you need to look out for when dating a man, so you can tell if they might be right for you in the long term.

Is there chemistry between you?

Sometimes you can tell straight away if the two of you might work well as a couple, because for some people the chemistry just sizzles from the first moment. However, if this does not happen straight away, it doesn’t mean it never will. Getting to know someone better can lead to passion and, in some cases, it is these bonds which turn out to be the strongest. However, if you are physically or emotionally turned off by the person you are dating, it’s more likely that chemistry will never happen.

Can you see yourself feeling love and affection for this person?

As Mrs Obama says, ‘Don’t look at the bankbook or the title. Look at the heart. Look at the soul’. No matter how good your dating partner is on paper, if you can’t feel genuine affection and love for the man himself, your relationship will never feel complete. Try and see beyond the job title to the person inside.

Can you communicate?

Dating a man who leaves you guessing may seem fun in the short term, for a long-term relationship it’s important to know you can communicate your thoughts and feelings in an open and honest way. A man who cannot communicate anything meaningful about himself could make for a very frustrating partner!

Do you share values?

This doesn’t have to mean that you both vote for the same political party, or even that you are of the same religion. In most cases, it is the thousands of day-to-day choices people must make which will have the most impact on whether a relationship survives or fails. If you and the person you are dating can agree on the basics, that’s a great start.

Do you have common goals?

While this point may not be for a first date, it is important to get an idea over time for whether or not you share long-term goals with your dating partner, such as if you would like to get married, have children or simply would like to enjoy a carefree life of fun and travel. Get too far down the line without figuring these things out and you could be in for a nasty surprise.

Do you feel happier with him around?

The last thing Michelle Obama pointed out is that, for a relationship to work, you have to feel genuinely happy and at peace when you are with the man you are dating, and that he treats you with courtesy and respect at all times. ‘When you’re dating a man,’ she said, ‘you should always feel good. You shouldn’t be in a relationship with somebody who doesn’t make you completely happy and make you feel whole.’

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By: Emily Heart

Dating Tips: Dos and Don’ts For Confident Dating

March 25, 2011 on 12:01 am | In Uncategorized | No Comments

Dating can be nerve-wracking, but project the right amount of confidence and you will put yourself, and your dating partner, at ease. This is easier said than done, however, there are some tried and tested methods of dating with confidence.

DO: wear clothes you have felt confident in before

While it may be tempting to buy a whole new set of clothes to impress a new dating partner, our favourite clothes really can have a magic affect, making us feel relaxed and confident, instantly. It’s always important to wear clothes which are appropriate for the occasion but, whenever possible, choose clothes which you know make you feel good about yourself. Most of us have a favourite top, dress or suit which never fails to put us in a good mood.

DON’T: fidget

One of the main indicators that someone is nervous is if they constantly fidget. Repeated adjustments of clothing or tearing up a napkin into smaller and smaller pieces are two examples of how your hand movements can betray your nerves when dating. To prevent your hands from showing your anxieties, clasp them together or keep them out of sight.

DO: look into their eyes (but not all the time)

Eye contact is crucial when dating. It shows you are comfortable with your date and interested in them and what they have to say. Lack of eye contact will either come across as rude or imply that you are intimidated by them. Keep eye contact while either of you are talking, but be careful, an uninterrupted gaze can come across as creepy, so it is important to look away from time to time, as well..

DON’T: slump in your seat

Your posture will play a large part in how your dating partner perceives you. If you slump forward in your seat, or (if you are upright) walk or stand hunched, looking constantly at the floor, you will not just appear unconfident, but inevitably feel it, too. Practice keeping good posture when sitting and standing. One way to do this is to count the chimneys as you walk down the street – just make sure you don’t trip over while you do it!

DO: stand by your opinions

An unconfident person will immediately crumble when their thoughts or opinions are challenged. When the person you are dating questions of queries your ideas, acknowledge their point of view but try not to relinquish your opinion straight away. You may want to please your date, but what they probably want is some sort of discussion, as opposed to you instantly backing down and agreeing with their argument.

DON’T: talk at warp speed

Nervous people tend to speak very quickly and often don’t even realize they’re doing it. This can create an uptight feeling to the date, so you may need to consciously slow yourself down. Talking fast may also give no opportunity for your date to get a word in. Slow down and don’t worry about allowing a silence from time to time, silences are not always awkward and can allow your dating partner to gather their thoughts.

DO: Wear a smile

One of the clearest indicators of confidence is smiling, and this will also put your date at ease. Make sure you greet your dating partner with a big smile, and respond to them with a smile whenever possible.

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By: Emily Heart

Dating Tips For Men – Dos and Don’ts When Dressing For a First Date

March 20, 2011 on 4:19 pm | In Uncategorized | No Comments

Dressing for a first date is as important for men as it is for women. It goes without saying that the impression you make when you first start dating someone will decide whether you progress to a second or third date, so getting it right, or at least not getting it totally wrong, the first time around is crucial.

DO: be comfortable and be yourself

It can be tempting to go all out when you’re dating someone new and spend time dressing to impress. While the location will dictate what you should wear to some extent, most women will not expect a man to put on a suit for a first date, and anything too formal could make the occasion seem a bit stuffy and uptight. It’s always best when dating to choose clothes you feel most confident and relaxed in, ensuring that all items of clothing are fresh and clean. Being clean and well-groomed are much better things to focus on for a first date than wearing an expensive or flashy suit.

DON’T: overdo the aftershave

One of the most common mistakes among men who are trying to impress women is arriving in a thick haze of pungent-smelling aftershave or cologne. While marginally preferable to body odour, wearing too much aftershave is like wearing a massive sign which says ‘out on the pull’. It’s very distracting and hard to take someone seriously when they are emanating a strong smell, so try to keep it subtle.

DO: pick your shirt carefully

Dating can be nerve-wracking and this presents a particular sartorial issue for many men, which advance planning can prevent – sweat patches. Sweat patches are very unappealing for the woman you’re dating and embarrassing for you, so it’s important to eliminate this risk in the first place. Choose your shirt carefully; ideally pick one which you know does not show sweat. If you are wearing a new shirt, it should be made of a breathable fabric such as cotton, rather than nylon or man-made fabrics.

DON’T: experiment

Dating is not a good time to experiment with unknowns. New shoes and clothes can have a habit of bringing unwanted surprises the first time you wear them, which will not be welcome when you’re trying to focus on the person you are dating. New grooming products can also have a habit of behaving in unexpected ways. In all elements of your presentation, therefore, try to stick to what you know has worked well in the past and don’t be tempted to try and wow your date with a drastically new style. Hats, for example, go in and out of fashion, but these should be removed during a date as they can be distracting and make it seem that you are hiding something. Sunglasses in the evening are always, always wrong: she knows you’re not an undercover celebrity.

DO: Wear a good pair of shoes

Many men, with arguably less style options open to them then there are to women, end up channelling all their fashion sensibilities into ‘directional’ shoes. Women, however, tend to appreciate a more classic style of footwear on men. If you are wearing jeans then aim for a clean and classic pair of trainers. If the rest of your clothes are smarter, choose a classic and smart pair of shoes. With footwear, it’s safest to keep it classic, and to always make sure shoes are clean. Scruffy shoes will imply you have made no effort for the person you are dating. One last dating rule for shoes: never, ever, wear socks with sandals.

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By: Emily Heart

How to Go From Dating to Long-Term Love

March 20, 2011 on 3:14 pm | In Uncategorized | No Comments

Dating can be lots of fun but, according to the LoveGeist Report 2009, 95% of singles in the UK would prefer to be in a long-term relationship.

It’s one thing going on a few successful dates, but quite another turning dating into a long-lasting partnership. For many people, the transition can present a number of challenges, particularly if they have become accustomed to living as a single person.

However, there are some simple steps you can take which may just transform your relationship and make living as a couple a much more enjoyable experience. Here are some of the most important things to remember when you realise you would like to make the move from dating to long-term love.

Keep the dating vibe alive

When you’re dating, going out together will happen automatically. In a long-term relationship, though, you need to consciously decide to make time for each other, without any outside distractions getting in the way, and to make this a priority.

If you don’t do this, weeks or months can slip past without a decent conversation or a relaxed evening together, simply because the chores and hassles of daily life have gradually been allowed to take over.

To keep the spark alive, it is important to get back into that dating mode and spend at least one night per week together, and sitting in front of the television doesn’t count! Most couples benefit from having a ‘date night’ when both sides know it is time to get out and enjoy each other’s company.

Do fun things together

Dating partners tend to have quite a lot in common and to enjoy a number of similar things. As you move towards a life lived together, keep these interests alive.

Activities such as sharing a pleasurable hobby, or even simply enjoying a fun film or a good meal together, are all good ideas because sharing pleasure and fun helps to cultivate intimacy between two people, and all good long-term relationships need to have a solid foundation of intimacy.

Embark on long-term projects as a couple

Dating activities tend be short-lived, such as going to a film or an event together. When you become a couple, it can be good for your relationship to enter into long-term projects or activities together, as these can help to create shared common ground.

Examples of long-term activities include taking a course together, starting a new fitness regime or taking on DIY projects – anything which goes beyond typical dating activities and requires some level of mutual commitment and effort over time.

This kind of long-term goal will help you work together when life changes take place in the future, such as having children.

Make up quickly

When you’re dating, conflicts may arise but they matter less as you aren’t spending all your time together. In a long-term relationship, disagreements and conflicts can fester and create rifts in the partnership if not dealt with properly.

Try to resolve conflicts early and with an emphasis on compromise and fairness to both sides, as this will prevent resentment and hurt building up over time. Many successful long-term couples say they always try not to go to bed on an argument.

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By:Emily Heart

Dating Sites – How to Make an Online Dating Profile

March 17, 2011 on 1:39 am | In Uncategorized | No Comments

In life, first impressions are vital. Most people cannot help but make a snap judgement in the first few seconds of meeting someone. In online dating, the effect is amplified because it is so easy to dismiss a dating profile which doesn’t grab your attention (or one which grabs it in the wrong way!)

While it is easy to fall into the trap of making mistakes when you’re new to online dating, like using hackneyed clichés on your profile or posting dodgy photos, if you read these top tips on online dating profiles, you’re far more likely to get a head start.


Photos which are clear and well lit and show you smiling in front of a pleasant background are most likely to garner interest from people on online dating sites. A green and leafy park or an interesting place which could present an initial talking point are good choices for backgrounds. Grey concrete walls, offices or your bedroom are not so ideal. Also, it is best not to take your own profile picture – it can look as though you have no friends to do it for you!

What to write?

There are so many thousands of dating profile pages that it seems a fairly tall order to come across as genuinely original and witty. However, if you steer away from some of the most over-used catchphrases and clichés, your profile is far more likely to generate interest.

Examples of online dating profile page cliches:

‘I am happy spending a night on the sofa with a bottle of wine and a good movie’. Who isn’t? This doesn’t really say anything about you because it is too generic. Try to be more specific about your interests.

‘I’ve never done this before’ – the subtext behind this statement is that you see online dating as a little weird, or that you’re insecure. Remember – the people reading your profile are also dating online, it is best not to come across as sceptical or cautious about online dating.

‘My friend persuaded me join this site’ – why – because you would never have done such a thing on your own? Once again – the people reading this are also online dating, so it’s important not to alienate them by making it sound like you were reluctant to try online dating by yourself.

‘Hi, my name is Amy and I’m 32’. If this is your opening paragraph then it’s not exactly going to stand out amongst the other profiles. Try to start with something that gives a real insight into you as a person, as opposed to straight facts.

Check it through carefully

If your profile page has mistakes, this can have some fairly long-lasting consequences. One example of this is a dating site user who wanted to make the point on his online dating profile that he was Egyptian. After weeks of few responses, he took another look at his dating profile, only to discover he had accidentally implied he was only interested in dating Egyptians. Once the mistake was corrected, he had a lot more success!

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By Emily Heart

The Ultimate Guide to Blind Dating

March 16, 2011 on 2:15 am | In Uncategorized | No Comments

A blind date can be an exciting way to meet someone new. However, if you’re dating someone you know next to nothing about, you will need to approach the date with care and discretion if it is to have any chance of success. Here are some of the things you need to think about if you are embarking on a blind date.

Venue / activity

Choosing a venue for a blind date can be tricky. By definition, blind dates involve meeting someone you have limited or no information about, so the best option is probably to keep it neutral and pick a universally popular dating location. A coffee date, drinks at a pub or a quiet dinner at a restaurant are safe options for blind dating.

If you don’t know each other at all, it can even be acceptable to meet at a party or within a group of friends. This way, you have a chance to work out quickly if you would like to spend more time together without piling on the pressure.

Preparing for a blind date

When you are getting ready for a blind date you should put in just as much effort as if you were going to meet someone you were already interested in. If you find out that you and your blind date aren’t ideally suited to one another, nothing is lost. However, if you hit it off straight away, you know you have made enough of an effort to give a great impression.

First impression

First impressions are extremely important on a blind date. The less you know about one another, the more vital the first impression will be. Crucially, don’t let a look of disappointment spread over your face, even for an instant. If your date is something different to what you were expecting, it can’t benefit anyone to make an issue of this. A calm and friendly approach is best for this nerve-wracking moment.


When dating someone you’ve had absolutely no contact with before, the conversation will be a little different from if you had already been messaging them on a dating site, or had encountered them in a different situation such as at a party. It can be good to prepare a little for a blind date in that sense, with simple questions, perhaps about your date’s lifestyle, hobbies and their perspectives about the latest news story or TV show.

Ending the date

It’s important to end a blind date tactfully. If you know you don’t want to organise a second date, don’t be tempted to feign an interest in getting together again. There is nothing more likely to get you blacklisted by the singles community than the phrase ‘I’ll call you’ if it’s not then followed up with a call. A simple ‘it was lovely to meet you’ is an appropriate way to end a date without appearing rude.

However, if you are interested getting to know them better and they would too, why not organise the second date straight away? This way, neither party goes home feeling confused about the situation.

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5 Easy Way’s To Impress Her

March 15, 2011 on 2:28 am | In Uncategorized | No Comments

Being with a gorgeous woman on a dinner date can be a deeply romantic occasion. As your love blossoms you will remember these occasions with pleasure, as will she. You should enjoy it as much as you can and be yourself. However, if you want to make the evening go even more smoothly then take note of these simple but effective tips. It doesn’t matter if the only meal out you have is a hamburger and fries, follow these five dating tips and you’ll come across like a connoisseur.

1) Guide her to the table

Take your time as you enter the restaurant and allow the waiting staff to do their job. However, when they lead you to the table, let your dating partner slip ahead and touch the small of her back with your open palm, gently guiding her to the table. It is a small sign of affection which shows that you are in control, but not controlling, feel protective of her, but aren’t being too pushy.

2) Smell the wine, don’t sip it

Ordering wine worries some people, so here’s the most reassuring dinner dating tip you can have – the restaurant’s house wine (usually the cheapest) should be perfectly ok! No decent restaurant will have a poor house wine if it wants to stay in business. When the waiter brings the bottle ask to try it, swirl it in the glass and give it a smell. This is what the real experts do and it should be enough to discover if it is a decent wine, so don’t bother sipping it.

3) Eat like a man

You don’t have to order bloody steak but it’ll do no harm, unless you are dating a vegetarian. Order big, order plenty and eat the lot. There’s nothing more off-putting to a women when dating than a bloke who eats less than she does. She’ll have more fun if she can relax and see you happily tucking in, so get that T-Bone and make it extra rare!

4) Let her take some of your food

A lot of women hate to appear glutinous and won’t want to order food which makes them appear to be greedy when dating a man. However, just because she’s ordered a salad it doesn’t mean she doesn’t fancy a bit of your steak. Some guys hate it when others take from their plate – get over it! For many women, sharing is caring. If she isn’t allowed to share your food, then don’t expect her to share anything else with you. The best advice is to offer her a bite after you have taken just one mouthful.

5) Be a gent and pay

We get so confused in the 21st century about how to settle the bill when dating, but whoever complains about receiving a free meal? Take the bill straight from the waiter and whip out the credit card. It shows you are generous, a good potential provider and you earn your own money – what’s unattractive about that? Of course, if she insists then this shouldn’t be the cause for an argument. Maybe suggest that she buys the after-meal drinks as a compromise. If she wants the date to continue after dinner then chances are she’s had a good time.

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By: Emily Heart

Important Principles of Writing a Profile That Reflects Optimism

February 22, 2011 on 3:26 pm | In Uncategorized | No Comments

You’re online dating profile. This is where your potential matches get their all important first view and initial opinion of you and what you are saying about yourself! Successful online daters can express their personality and the interesting facts about themselves!

Keeping your profile positive and avoiding at all cost any type of negativity is a great start, remember that people are attracted to other singles that are positive in the things they say and do. Profiles that have negative comments tend to push away other singles before they even give any consideration to the positive things that you may have to offer. Think of negativity in a profile or any other thing in life as strong bug repellent! When writing your profile go to great lengths to put a positive spin to the wording you write when expressing your personality and goals that you have in life.

These positive words that you fill you’re online dating profile with form a picture in the minds of other singles that create a spark or interest in wanting to know more about you and that will ultimately lead to more dates and finding the perfect match. Also, be very clear and concise when identifying what qualities you are looking and expecting for in you’re perfect match. Writing a successful profile is somewhat of a creative act and should be done with careful and thoughtful planning as your goal is to generate as large of an audience as possible to read your work! More singles interested in reading and seeing your profile and photo simply equals more chances of finding the right one for you. Unfortunately, many single women and men post profiles and photos that reflect to much negativity and this does nothing but cause a potential match to continue their search and you are never given the opportunity to show what you really have to offer.

If you put forth a genuine effort when writing you’re profile you can always find a way to phrase your sentence in a positive way without sounding fake or unappealing. For instance, you’re profile saying something like “I am searching for someone that handles situations and discuss relationship and everyday issues in a calm, controlled and loving manner” can express to other singles that you are a positive and mature single. A singles quest to finding the perfect long term successful relationship is like planning and successfully executing the perfect road trip, periodically checking the traffic behind you but focusing your attention and goals on the journey ahead and reaching your destination successfully and safely. Good Luck and Happy Online Personals Dating to all Singles! a leading online singles personals dating site for single women and men seeking to find true love and lasting relationships.

Four Online Dating Rumors That Seniors Face

January 30, 2011 on 6:42 pm | In Uncategorized | Comments Off

Many seniors who are turning to online dating for the first time might be apprehensive or even downright fearful because of the rumor’s that circulate on the internet. Here are some important facts that all seniors should take into consideration in their dating endeavors to find true love and a lasting relationship!

Myth#1 – Dating Sites are for the Younger Singles Only

Fact: There are many online dating sites that are designed for seniors. Over the last several years, people ages 55+ have been maybe the fastest growing demographic, thousands of seniors are using online dating as a way to find a loving relationship again. Don’t let age fool you people of all ages are having great success with online dating!

Myth#2- You Must be Computer Savvy

Fact: Level of computer knowledge is somewhat compared to knowledge required to drive your care down the road. There are several very basic things required to register and use a singles dating site such as uploading your profile picture, pointing your mouse and clicking. These can be conquered in a matter of minutes. If you can point and click then you have nothing to fear when using or registering on your favorite singles dating site.

Myth#3- They are Not Safe

Fact: You must always take caution and use your common sense anytime you are meeting new people not matter how you go about meeting them! For singles that are using dating sites have gone to great lengths to increase safety for their users, such as options to verify identity and with online dating you can get to know each other before you ever meet for the first time. Also, online dating sites give you the opportunity to let you decide when you want to make yourself and your information available to people searching for other like minded singles.

Myth#4- It is Only for Scammers

Fact: Scammers are around in the online world and everywhere else for the matter, There is and always will be issues dealing with scammers no matter what you are involved in, with the online dating scene, scammers try to work the system by meeting

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